by schiaparelli » Sun Dec 14, 2014 10:16 pm
just realized that the #1 reason i should be cropping out my face is not quite privacy concerns
but bc it's impossible to take a fitpic without a dumb look on my face
but i feel like the shape of your hair makes a difference in how a fit reads
what to do
—
i'm remembering now this art kid i know from college who sewed a printed comic strip to the inside of her jacket, just under the brand tag. i'm kind of interested in this idea of her asserting control over her jacket as definitely hers and not this idea and artifact from [/i]insertbrandhere[/i] she just happened to wear, and i'm also wondering if she did some super subtle lamination or protection on it so it wouldn't tear or wear away.
one of my friends used to joke about sneaking into another friend's closet and just sewing secret pockets into everything in the dead of the night, so that the other friend would wake up and feel this surreal sense of "is this really mine? did this always have pockets? have i just not been noticing these?"
i kind of want to sew weird shit into the inside of my clothing. the same way people have lockets with a portrait of someone or a hair sample (man, people back in the day were super weird), i'd bring around these odd little scraps of paper that friends or acquaintances have written for me. i've done a lot of team/group bonding/farewell exercises where people write a bunch of tiny anonymous compliments to you, and some of the compliments people have written for me seem like a better idea of who i want to be than i can come up with myself. what's the significance of carrying around other people's words, though? and why do i feel like i need to carry things around to show that they're meaningful to me?
in general i keep a lot of stuff around that feels like it should matter to me, and the truth is it did and does, but i'm not convinced that it means enough to hold on to a thousand tiny pieces of clutter. like—things that old and departed friends have given you—why does it feel like a betrayal to not keep them around? is it because without the physical artifact you feel the memories about them are more impermanent? what kind of permanence matters more? does physical permanence maintain mental permanence?
really i think i'm just searching for something to do, because i have a 12-page paper due tomorrow and i just found a box of needles and thread in my room.