by zayg » Mon Apr 07, 2014 1:46 pm
Man, this thread hits right in the feels.
I never really had much for talents growing up except for perhaps being pretty good at playing WoW and not doing homework in high school. For whatever reason though, my playing with Legos as a child and building houses in the Sims for months on end led me to pursue architecture in high school. After four years of being part of a tight knit community of people looking for the same thing, I decided my senior year that I wanted nothing to do with it anymore. I didn't really have anything else to do, nor did I know what else I could do. I didn't even know what the hell an engineer did.
Decided to go for business at a state school and hated it. I didn't necessarily mind the major but I really didn't enjoy the school, but I managed to get good grades. I left after a year, decided I wanted to go to art school for photography, which was a hobby that I managed to pick up and still try and partake in today. Got into a pretty good school and got offered a ton of money, but realized I still could afford a couple Porsche 911s for the money I'd pay so I decided to bail out. Went to community college to finish up that business associates and made some good relationships with a few of the department heads. One of them pushed me towards my current school where I started a few months ago, and I decided to apply. Got in for management and then realized that it was a useless degree and that I wanted something that actually had some specific skills that have some sort of application to them. Before I started, I looked into the majors a bit more and settled on "Global Supply Chain Management" which is basically a fancy name for supply chain management. Realizing that it actually had some sort of applied skills that I actually found interesting, as well as being in demand, I settled on it.
So now I'm a few months into that. I've battled some depressed feelings over the past few years in relation to my future, at times almost wanting to drop off the face of the earth and live in the woods because I spent too much time on the internet reading about how worthless you are unless you are an engineer or a programmer. I realized that sitting around in a cubicle isn't for me, and I hope to work in a field that allows me a bit of travelling or at least not working in a traditional office setting. SCM is great because it often involves working in manufacturing settings. I have found that I would much rather spend time in a manufacturing setting with the type of people that end up there than some soulless office that I loathe.
Ultimately I'd like to apply my SCM education and get into the fashion industry. I'm not too sure how to get into that, but I expect it would be after college and I would need to move to New York. I also have been making a conscious effort to just attempt to live more happily. I read more, I take more photographs, I have been planning out a photobook and a trip this summer that will hopefully give me a new project to work on, I have an amazing girlfriend that I don't tell her how much I appreciate her as much as I should, and I often find happiness in the littlest details. A clean room can bring some sort of happiness. A perfectly fitting shirt is something I can find happiness in. The feelings I get when imagine how rad my fits are gonna be this summer rocking my new qlo linen pants make me happy. Daydreams about a nice little apartment with minimal decoration and a few plants that I hope to learn how to not kill makes me happy.
So yeah, I try to stay optimistic about my future despite how hard it can be. I at least have some sort of goals, and I figure that if I keep creating things then I will be happy. I seem to get most depressed when I go into periods where I do not produce anything. Whether it is my photography, or cooking a pizza or something, or even come up with an analysis of a book that I haven't thought of before, I feel as if we as humans have to produce something for us to feel fulfilled. If I end up wanting to kill myself after 5 years in my career, I plan on hitting up trade school and become a welder or opening up a nice little pizza shop.