care-tags.org

using f.lux or avoiding screens after evening is huge for me

I commented on a girl's instagram photo of her latte art and this made her instagram direct me and after a 7 hour conversation that strayed far from coffee she gave me her number and now she's saying she's gonna force me to go shopping with her. I don't know the fuck this just happened but I'm enjoying every minute of it, wow

Fuck, parts of this hit way too hard and close to home. I've mentioned before stuff about my dad and how he's not really (and hasn't really been) in most of my life. idk. just wanted to share the video. it's powerful.

Almost all of my friends are people I met through friends I had in high school. I completely lack social competence and am often unable to even speak to people I know in public. I often hang out with the friends I have but I'm still pretty lonely.

Feelings-wise, I usually feel boredom or stress. Sometimes, I have fun on the weekends, but it's just becoming so routine that I can predict how nights will end (lonely).

if you self admittedly can predict the routine and are not enjoying it then why subscribe to it? it can be really daunting to challenge stuff like this as we're so used to wanting to feel safe and scared of feeling even more removed than you already are feeling, but if you can overcome this hill the reward is more than worth it. i had this problem with a lot of my friends in high school, they're great friends but we're all so different in interests you never really feel deeply accepted for who you are but you don't want to be removed from the group anymore.

it's here you have to take steps for your happiness, is there a hobby you have? an interest you want to peruse? do you have bands that you want to see? use members of that pre-installed friend base you have to do stuff you're actively interested in and interact with them in a way which benefits you both. for example, i've been clubbing with mates, is it my favorite thing to do every single weekend? not even close twice a year is more than enough for me, but i do know members of that group like bands or restaurants i want to visit and enjoy so i invite them here. you then build stronger relationships with the friends you have as they see you taking an active role in building bridges, but also safety in numbers to use these events to find more friends at these activities who may be more in-tune with your interests.

is it easy? no, not in the slightest it takes a lot of courage for someone with social anxiety's and it's not going to happen overnight, you may be knocked back but don't let that stop you. even if they agree to go with you you may still feel fear, or stress while doing these activities you enjoy as it uncharted territory this is natural, most people don't get on a bike and instantly ride it for the first time even though they want to learn and do it. it all comes back to this practice and wanting to do something.

you can do this, and it's hard at first but the greatest waves start of as tiny ocean ripples.

I appreciate it. I just don't really know how to make friends. I often prefer being alone to being with people I'm not comfortable with but it just gets kind of lonely.

And idk about my schedule. I already go to concerts occasionally, write for a local publication, participate in a fashion design group, and take 15 hours. And I'll probably start hitting the gym again soon. I just feel extremely busy, but none of these things really bring me friendships. I feel like I'll make more good friends over time but I'm just impatient.

sorry deleted

I matched with this girl on Tinder about a week ago and noticed that she followed me on tumblr, and that I follow her (yes another tumblr girl..). We wrote a bit and after two days of writing she asked if we should get a cup of coffee, which I was ecstatic about. We planned it for friday (yesterday) and I was fucking nervous. She is really really really beautiful, and I honestly had no idea why SHE asked me out. We planned to meet up at this coffee shop, and turns out there are two of them and I was at the wrong one, so already there it went wrong. But I made it to the other coffee shop and we started talking. It was really awkward at first but it became really fun after half an hour. I could tell she was really nervous because she kept saying "God dammit (her name) that was so awkward saying that". But I liked it. She talks a fucking ton and she can talk about fucking ANYTHING and really anywhere, and I like it. We ended up talking for 8 hours, going to a few coffee shops and eating some lunch at McDonalds at 11pm because we hadn't been eating anything all day. We walk to her car and she drives me home. I sat in her car for what felt like half an hour trying to get myself to kiss her goodnight, but she was way too nervous so I just called it a night. Then 5 minutes after she drove off, she texted me why the fuck I didn't kiss her. We planned to meet up again soon and make up for that mistake (smiling)

talking for 8 hours sounds like an absolute nightmare

i want to find something i want to pour my life into.

Since my friend died last year, I've truly came to realize that life is really fragile.

might not be 'feeltalk' per se, but it's still a problem of mine that's been lingering over me for the past few months

for the past few months, my life has been very reminiscent of the movie groundhog day. i wake up, go to school, do all my hw and then browse various fashion forums while in school (because i have the good fortune of not being put into any of the same classes as my friends + two study halls), go swimming, go home, and then go back to fashion browsing / watching netflix (no cable) / staring blankly at my computer screen trying and failing to think of something to do, and then go to bed. on weekends i'll wake up, go swimming again, come back home, nap, then maybe go out in a predictable manner if i'm in the mood. all in all, though, the weeks have all become the exact same. it's been ridiculously boring, yet there's nothing really i can think of to make it better; nevertheless, i'm looking for a way to break the cycle of monotony.

basically, what i'm asking here is if anyone of you have any tips on how to make life interesting in times like this? anything to do for fun to get my mind off how bored i am all the time? any fun websites for when i'm bored in study hall (NOT reddit, working to get away from there), books, shows, or films you guys have been into lately? i'm just looking to try as many new things as possible so that the next three months aren't the longest of my life.

if anything, though, the good that has come from this is that i know i won't want to fall into the stereotypical, 9-to-5, disgruntled worker trope, so yay on that at least!

edit: actually been drumming for about 9 years now. had to move my kit out to my uncle's place in michigan (from chicago) and haven't had the time to go pick it up again, though... >:(

@finolino
Find a specific thing that is interesting to you and try to become as knowledgeable as you can about it. It could be an author, a film or music genre, a period in art, a philosophical idea, or anything similar to that. Try to gain personal insight on the topic if possible. This provides purpose and direction, and also can be quite fun.

Well the thing with the tumblr girl crashed and burned faster than anticipated.

i know logic isn't the end all when it comes to emotions and feeltalk, but that really just makes no sense to me.. Sounds like you're over thinking it and trying to rely too much on fate than effort. Maybe I am just reading too far into things with too little information though.

For whatever reason I can't shake the feeling that your late 20's is a horrible age

did not do well enough on my lsat to get into the only school i'm interested in going to

sucks because i spent $600ish on a prep course and $150ish on the test itself, plus countless hours studying and shit, and my score only raised 2 points from last time. my boyfriend and i just broke up, i think partly because of all the time i was needing to spend alone to study.

and it was all for nothing. if i want to go to law school i have to retake this fucking test in june, but i'm not sure i want to go through this again. i told myself my score on this test could maybe be a sign/decider of whether i truly should pursue law school; my score is a resounding no.

i feel so fucking bummed and generally completely lost in life

FUCKKKKK IT

I was too quick to judge regarding the tinder girl. My temper was through the roof that day and sadly I threw it all. But I wrote her back the day after and said sorry and we chatted for a bit and agreed to still do the date today. So we spent 8 hours together again in my appartment just watching shit on netflix, eating pizza, drinking licorice tea and having sex. It was great. Can't wait to see what comes out of this (smiling)

Edit: mc-lunar, definitely learned a lesson! :D

"wait was it a tumber or tinder girl social media applications r impirtant"

Tumblr and tinder.

hey guys i just wanted to thank everyone for your kind thoughts and words of encouragement re: my post above, especially (seriously thanks for taking the time out of your day to specifically address and help with a stranger's problems, you are too awesome). i was so distraught and overwhelmed at that point and everyone made me feel a little bit better.

not really sure what i'm going to do career-wise. might re-take the LSAT, but also just applied to a cool job at apple that i will probably never hear back about. who knows what the future holds.

anyways, thanks guys. you rule

It just dawned on me today how incredibly happy I've been the past year. Not everything has gone perfectly, but I've been overwhelmingly content, cheerful, and positive regardless of the outside world. I can't remember the last time I've cried out of sadness (outside of books/movies), but I laugh everyday.

:DDDD

yo this ferguson shit is terrible

Friend shared that they tried to end their life earlier this week. Not sure what to do/say/feel but hoping I can be a positive force in their life.