Feelings

[WussWayne]

Who even drives a car let alone changes their own oil in 2016?

[bels]

Why does it take me three hours from waking up to leaving the house. Should I buy a SAD lamp? Should I electrocute myself? Should I buy fresh vitamin D tablets in case mine are expired? Should I have the heating switch off in the morning instead of switch on?

All considerations accepted.

[maj]

only 3? it's gone down from the 7 when you browsed ebay then

go to bed earlier, dont use black out blinds if you are, put ur feet on the ground when you wake up, get a radio alarm clock so there is some noise in your room and make u feel ~connected to the world~

[beach]

I am getting increasingly stressed about the idea of moving apartments when the lease is up in April. My boyfriend wants to move, because this place is really small and he doesn't like it (although I am quite satisfied with micro-living). Part of it is my fault, since my clothes/objects take up a lot more space than his. This is my first real apartment after leaving the college dorms, I like the landlords, and it's relatively cheap (we live in Manhattan and would not find somewhere at the same price without increasing commute time quite a bit). I've talked to him about it, but there is really no good solution.
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eta that our apartment now is like ~250sf. It would be hard to make a significant difference in space no matter what I got rid of.

ALSO! Yesterday my landlord posted a bigger apartment, for only $40 more, and right down the block from us! Posting your feels on c-t gets results!!
The open house is tonight, please pray 4 us that the landlord will let me break the lease early~~~
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eta someone else took that place woe is me.
i will continue to update this post with my fascinating tales

[meatjacket]

double post lmao!

[meatjacket]

quite interesting weekend, got invited to hang out and spend tghe night w a bunch of friends, but felt mostly left out (not excluded but i felt like they got along with each other better than connecting w me) and to further confirm my point i kinda got ditched at breakfast when i went to the restroom and they all left without me lol

:-(

i think they were too stoned to remember i was w them so i dont really care

[hamburgerlady]

i feel like taking naps with someone you like is the best.

there's this girl i've been really into for the past few months.
she came over 2 days ago to jam with me (she plays piano/synth) and she's really cute.
i don't really know if she's really interested though, i've probably been over-thinking this, but there are little hints here and there.
i asked her out to go to this chinese new year's parade on valentine's day, so we'll see how it turns out there. i hope to at least make my feelings well-known.

i wanna take naps with this girl.

[wolflarsen]

It's great to see people taking steps to seek support through therapy. I swear by my cognitive behavioral therapist. He's saved my life.


That said, it's been a rough winter. Lots of family health issues, being a local news reporter sucks and the company I work at is a dead end and winter has increased my depressive tendencies. Had an anxious breakdown that resulted in trying to hurt myself and ended the relationship of a lifetime. Mental breakdown AND heartbreak is a major bummer.

BUT, getting back to therapy, taking an interest in fitness and rediscovering all of the things that I used to enjoy as hobbies -- cooking, playing music, writing -- means things are certainly looking up.

Hang in there everyone and try to stay grounded in the present!

[donut_milk]

Yeah so like...I'm gonna be 30 this year and I've pretty much been laid off from every job I've held (save for one or two) since graduating college 7 years ago. I'm pretty sure when potential employers look at my resume when I apply they think I jump around a lot and would be a liability. Plus, I landed a nice gig last June but had to leave within two months due to my spouse landing a new job and relocating; I was really excited about that one too (they wouldn't allow remote)! So here I am in a new city applying like crazy but nothing yet. It really is a job to look for a job and apply. On top of that my independent/freelance work has slowed down. I probably wouldn't be as stressed out if I didn't have an embarrassing amount of student loans to pay off -- honestly, if I didn't have that then I think I would be OK. It's also very...demotivating to have to ask my spouse for money every month to pay towards it (but I am so very thankful he is helping me out during this dark period).

So, I mostly spend time in my home office grinding out personal projects, self-loathing, and fluctuating between feeling fine to absolute despair. 30 is not old and I know I still have lots of time ahead of me but, ya know, this is not how I imagined my life would be (but who honestly does?). I dunno, I've kinda given up and don't know what to do anymore.

[ahhh-aww]

since i finished school i don't go out anymore, been in home for like 6 months now. (heading out to buy groceries & paints though) i don't know if that's a good sign or not, but being alone feels good. having other people around is annoying and distracting.

[CheerUpBrokeBoy]

.

[meatjacket]

promotion at work! excitement! its entry level management which will lead into higher level (next level is salary i believe) management with an associates degree + 2 years experience.

[hamburgerlady]

update:
date was nice, the first thing she said when i gave her some valentine's day chocolate was: "we're friends, right? like just friends?"
haven't talked to her in awhile.
she's taking naps with some other guy now.

i turned 23 on friday though.

[lotion]

my brother, whom i'm very close with, had 2 kids with a woman who doesn't work, spends my brother's money on shitty clothes + makeup, and doesn't understand the importance of reading books to my almost 4 yr-old nephew.
i recently started an online shop and i'm doing decent for the first time ever despite being mostly poor my whole life
i visited my family in socal last weekend and my brother and mom were very awesome but adamant that i don't spend much on them
she kept bragging about how much i make to her friends that came over (while i was in town lol)
she kept bringing up how she wanted to go to disneyland with the whole family (that i'd pay for)
family member gave us both gift cards. i can't find mine now (i'm choosing to believe it fell out of my bag)
what a shitty situation

[lyysander]

I just accepted an invitation to join the Peace Corps, shipping out to Macedonia in mid-September. I want to be excited and proud but right now I just feel overwhelmed and anxious. Am I propagating Western/American imperialism even though I'm trying to do good? I have to stay closeted for the whole 27 months- what happens if someone finds out? I'm feeling drenched in anxiety even though I was so sure about this path for the past year.

[meatjacket]

girlfriend is in a mental insitution for a couple days. tough on both of us. im hoping they can help her...

[CheerUpBrokeBoy]

.

[ervhio]

Ready to post some good feelings in here.

I haven't been active on c-t since last summer, been lurking and appreciating the community though.

My first year of college has had ups and downs, but I've never felt more stimulated and free. I'm finishing this year knowing some very interesting people and knowing myself a little better, and this Sunday will be 6 months of dating an incredible girl. I'm amazed we found each other and amazed at how good it feels, how laying in bed, tired and stressed about finals, I can just think of her smile and feel a wave of comfort and contentment that almost makes me cry. It's flowery but true.

Thank you, everyone, for being here and having opinions and saying good things and bad things and reading my anonymous little words.

[WussWayne]

.

[windowflowers]

uuuuuuuuggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh

[parastexis]

feelings are always real, everything else only sometimes

[eufemism]

nearing that point where I might take a year off of school


I'm really conflicted about it because it's gonna take me 6 years to complete my bachelor's because of my shit grades and that's without taking a year off


My parents wanted me to go to school and get a good paying job that wasn't factory work like they have to work. I feel like I'm letting them down by not completing my degree in 4 years like everyone else. And I would especially feel like I let them down if I do take a year off and end up never going back.


Going to school for three years, having shit grades, taking a year off, graduating SEVEN years after starting college just for a bachelor's is humiliating.


I hate myself for letting myself get to this point. I made so many stupid silly mistakes that are causing me a lot of stress and a lot of money in debt.


FUCK

[YoungCanoeist]

I feel you, especially the feeling that you're letting your parents down. For a number of reasons including mental unhealth, I'm taking an extra year for my bachelor's too. I've felt uncomfortable with it at times, but I've actually met quite a few people that are doing more than four years and that's helped me warm up to it. Do you think that the bachelor's is ultimately a good goal for you?

[rjbman]

goodbye to my best friend of 13 years

fucking fuck this sucks. didnt even have enough notice to go home and say goodbye

[ASTROCHIMP]

.

[oldtrailmix]

My Nigel Cabourn jacket was stolen from me at my place of work. I'm hardly into clothes anymore, but that jacket was the only piece of clothing I ever truly loved. I used to just put it on for comfort, sometimes, on a lonely or cold night.

I'm a small town kid. I left it at work, which was dumb. Just never thought that someone would out and out steal it. I still expect it to be waiting for me in my closet. I loved that thing. Fuck.

[freddy]

[CheerUpBrokeBoy]

.

[CheerUpBrokeBoy]

double post lmao fuck me

awesome

[ramseames]

Yo that's some ice cold shit

Hug it out man I feel for you