by bels » Thu Oct 01, 2015 7:27 am
[INT meeting room 4.3 OTB Group HQ, Breganze, Italy. JOHN GALLIANO, RENZO RUSSO, BILL GAYTTEN and MARTIN MARGIELA'S TELEPRESENCE DRONE (a quadrotor copter spraypainted white) are sat at the conference table]
RENZO: OK, excellent. It's excellent to have everyone here, hopefully you have all remembered to bring with you two post it notes one upon which you have written what you felt was the most excellent part of our latest MAISON MARGIELA collection and one upon which you have written something you felt could be improved. Is that the case?
[ALL NOD EXCEPT FOR MMTD WHICH REMAINS IN A STATIONARY HOVER]
RENZO: Of course thank you and thank you to Martin who has agreed to join us remotely or allow a representative to pilot his drone in his stead.
[MMTD COMPLETES A BRISK FIGURE OF EIGHT]
RENZO: Excellent OK I will go first as I am RENZO RUSSO head of OTB Group and the boss should always go first no? We all agree I'm sure. I will start with what is most excellent about this collection and that is the amount of sales interest we have been generating. Market share, sales, revenue I think that is excellent, Bill, could you stick my post it to the whiteboard underneath the EXCELLENT column thank you.
[GAYTTEN RELUCTANTLY LOOKS AWAY FROM GALLIANO, STANDS UP AND SHYLY STICKS THE POST IT NOTE TO THE WHITEBOARD]
GALLIANO: Naturally. It is the space age, it is the future, it is 1992 and a young JOHN GALLIANO is at the PEAK of his prowess. This is the vision that I bring now, here, to 1988.
[GAYTTEN SITS DOWN AGAIN AND RESUMES GAZING DREAMILY AT GALLIANO]
RENZO: Excellent, yes, 1988 meets 2016 meets above excellent earnings for Q3 and on into Q4 and into Q5. Perhaps with all my money I should invent a Q5. Now, John, I must present my critical post it note next as I am the boss. Upon it I have written that the CODES of Maison Martin Margiela could have been more excellently expressed. The deconstruction, the reversal, painting things white, all excellent and sadly lacking. Bill could you stick my post it to the whiteboard underneath "NOT EXCELLENT" column.
[GAYTTEN GETS UP AGAIN TO STICK THE POST IT NOTE]
GALLIANO: What are these codes? I have deconstructed the codes themselves, and inside? There is no more Maison Martin Margiela. There is only Maison John Galliano, a name change? Perhaps it is time. It is the year 1987 and a young John Galliano meets Thierry Mugler in a Versailles gym. The two become firm friends and agree to get ripped by summer. The experience leads to Galliano's classic s/s 91 collection, the press reception? Rapturous.
[GAYTTEN IS LISTENING DREAMILY WITH HIS EYES CLOSED AND HAS FORGOTTEN TO STICK THE POST IT TO THE BOARD. MMTD LOSES CONTROL TEMPORARILY AND BUZZES NEAR HIS HEAD. HE AWAKENS WITH A START]
RUSSO: John, that is excellent but consider how excellent the CODES of the venerable House Margiela are? The tabi shoe, the painting things white, Kanye West. These are powerful, exceptional codes. They speak to the woman on the street who wishes to spend over five hundred euros on what is clearly a very plain pair of trousers but built with the quality and assurance that only OTB Group can be relied upon to provide. Bill could you write KANYE WEST on the board underneath the EXCELLENT column?
[GAYTTEN LOOKS AROUND FOR A MARKER, HE CANNOT FIND ONE. GALLIANO STANDS UP IN A RAGE]
GALLIANO: Kanye West and codes, the year is 1993, a young John Galliano, HOUNDED by the press, HUMBLED by the law, FORCED to work in the static, decaying SHELL of Maison John Galliano, the result? EXCEPTIONAL artistry, unheard of and unrecognised in his time.
GAYTTEN: I can't find a marker. Oh wait here's one.
[GAYTTEN FINDS A MARKER ON THE FLOOR AND TRIES TO WRITE WITH IT, HOWEVER IT IS DRY AND CAN ONLY PRODUCE A DARK SMUDGE]
GALLIANO: More LUST, more DRAMA in this body than in all of house MARGIELA, in this finger? More than all of OTB GROUP!
GAYTTEN: Oh no.. oh no... this is a flipboard marker oh no.
[GAYTTEN BEGINS FRANTICALLY ATTEMPTING TO WIPE AWAY THE DARK SMUDGE, NOW PERMANENT. RUSSO ALSO STANDS UP. HE IS GESTICULATING WILDLY]
RUSSO: I will not stand to hear ANYONE claim that OTB Group FORMERLY Only The Brave Group is NOT excellent. This lessons learned meeting is declared OVER. BILL, PLEASE COLLECT ALL POST IT NOTES AND FEED THEM TO VIKTOR AND ROLF.
[RUSSO STORMS OUT. GAYTTEN SCURRIES AROUND COLLECTING POST IT NOTES, HE PULLS THE WHITEBOARD FROM THE WALL AND TAKES IT WITH HIM AS HE LEAVES. GALLIANO HAS BEGUN CRYING]
GALLIANO: 1993, a young John Galliano is reduced to tears by a domineering and fascistic dictator, his crime? On more than one occasion becoming drunk and launching into anti-semetic tirades in public, even though he didn't mean it.
[MMTD FLIES OUT OF THE ROOM AT AN ANGLE THAT SUGGESTS IT IS DISGUSTED]