Feelings

[Blastoise]

Signed a lease on my first apartment yesterday. Living with my girlfriend and one of our really good friends, looking for a fourth (male) roommate but it's all good right now. Feeling a little too grown up so I'm going to watch cartoons tonight until 3:00 am.

Also took my girlfriend out to eat last night (Cosetta's in St. Paul, one of my favorites) and then to see A Christmas Story: The Musical. It was a lot of fun and really well done, I enjoyed it more than the movie I think. So that ended up being my Christmas present to her and she loved it.

Good vibes all around.

[zayg]

so nice to see friends from back home

just ended up at the hippest party with a bunch of cool stoners including one who owns a vintage clothing shop/art gallery. found out the photography i sell there has been their highest selling photography! listened to abbey road and i was very happy

[maj]

Negatives: coming home to find your bed dismantled, room redecorated and taken over for your brother while you sleep on an air bed with stuff thrown in the corner is not the one. Should have stayed in worcester like I wanted and will be from now on bar a week at summer and crimbo.

Positive: have 2 weeks of work and I'm not walking a 6 mile round trip to get to it.

[ramseames]

my friends parents sold his bed within like 2 weeks of him leaving for his 1st semester

[eufemism]

liking a girl that you're unsure likes one of your friends sucks

maybe i should still try to talk to her. no one wins a girl by not working for it right?

[tomsfood]

been feeling awfully nihilistic for about the past week, it fucking sucks

need to get over this soon

open to advice on how to get out of such a slump

[pei]

always thinking of walking away and disappearing

even easier in a country where your parents can't even contact you from

[Ques]

one of my elementary classmates just committed suicide. that makes five out of ninety people in my elementary class that have already passed away. makes me feel like i'm not invincible after all

[silvaeri]

for anyone who's been paying attention to my shitty experience with my thesis class and professor this semester. I did manage to pass thank god, and am currently in the process of filing a formal complaint with the department head about said professor

[arcticsound]

I'm a little afraid to post this in case I jinx it but GODDAMN things are looking up. I basically lost my job last week, but tbh I fucking hated that job so I'm excited to start looking for a new one. Aside from that, after battling some health problems and struggling to find work my GF finally found a job that she's excited about (started today) so once I find something we'll be so much better off financially, my very close family member who was on life support and was expected to die last month is making a very quick recovery, and I've got some big things happening with my music... My new EP that I've been sitting on with a label for ever is finally coming together and some people I really admire and who could help me a bunch are fucking with it, and some of my newer stuff that I'm working on now. I feel good things coming if I keep working.

I'm a little drunk right now so I'm just gonna get a little bit too excited and say that even just the anticipation and the hope that something better is on it's way for me is making me feel like pushing myself to the absolute edge just to keep my head up during the hell that's been the last few months was totally worth it. Wish me luck!

[mahi-mahi]

"There is no vulnerability in forgivness"
-Tim Riggins

I've really been trying to dedicate myself to the idea that I'm a good guy in the past few months but it's difficult due to past. But like the great Andre 3000 once said, Nostalgia can sometimes be a cage. Anyone relate to what I'm feeling? Trying to forgive Kevin now for the things Kevin did.

Are we today responsible for us yesterday?

[mahi-mahi]

In a perfect world, I'd make my $$$ by writing hooks for trap songs and selling them.
"MITCH CAUGHT A BODY BOUT A WEEK AGOO!!!"

[KLF]

having a lot of moments lately where i realize how strongly i've come feel for someone, and how close i feel to them. it's a little overwhelming sometimes but overall it is a good thing and i am very grateful to even have it in the first place. i look forward to our future.

i'm feeling conflicted on what direction my life is going and where i want it to go. it feels like i'm approaching the point where i will have to make some big decisions, and take big risks. it's kind of scary to think about, but i'm excited. i've overcome so much in the past year alone, and have come up from essentially nothing. regardless of what happens, i think i'll come out on top. i'm strong...

i can do it.

[agvs]

[bobo77]

Apparently in New Jersey if you get hit by a bus the injuries aren't covered under health insurance, but under auto insurance (because a VEHICLE was involved LOL FLAWLESS LOGIC). That's some bullshit, especially since my parent's auto insurance won't accept the claims. I've been having headaches and anxiety for the past month, and I think it might be related to the accident earlier this summer (considering I had a concussion), but the doctor's office won't accept my health insurance since I mentioned my accident over the phone as a potential cause (I don't even know if it's what's causing the anxiety, it could just be college/adventuring into adulthood stress). Uggh fuck healthcare.

[silvaeri]

really weird mix of emotions/feelings right now and i don't know why i'm feeling like this but i don't like it and it sucks

[WussWayne]

I angrily walked 20 k's keep to the next town. I fuckin hate my family.

[mahi-mahi]

Same. At señor frogs Orlando and everyone is drinking around me. IDK what to do :/

[UnwashedMolasses]

Wasn't sure whether to post about this here or not, but eh, it's not like there's any real consequences.

My girlfriend of five years who I've posted about quite a bit broke up with me.

Part of dating for so long was the issue that we became adults together, so we haven't been truly alone or single as adults at all. We were looking at ways to resolve that while still dating but she ended up being unable to - there's things she needs to work on that she can't do while still with me. Originally she wanted it to be a break but I refused that. If we do end up back together it will be as different people in a new relationship.

It's a difficult thing for me. The issues that drove us apart are things I've been working on for some time but they were never really my issues. Without wanting to self-aggrandize, I haven't had the same kind of questions and doubts that she has. I'm curious, of course, about what it'd be like to be single, but never enough to cause any kind of rift.

It's been a few days now. The first hard bit was dealing with not having that constant daily connection. When you know someone that intimately you can't replace it with social interaction (or with anything). Now that some time is passing I'm getting into the real meat of it, the directionless sadness. I'm not so unstable as to turn to vices to soothe it, so it's just a matter of feeling it out.

I am looking for a bit of advice/feedback on one aspect. When she broke up with me she emphasized that it was entirely a failing on her part that she had to sort out and that I was perfect, that I could've done nothing better or even differently. That's all well and good from a self-hatred perspective but if I had fucked up in some essential way that would at least give me a starting point for what to work on. For the first time in many years I'm unsure of how to move forward. I've got some ideas but I'm casting out into uncharted territory. If any of you have been through something similar, do you have any advice?

[bels]

Sounds like you don't really need to work on anything except accepting yourself for who you are and seeing where that takes you. You don't need some outside influence telling you what to work on and more importantly, for a lot of your life you probably won't be able to get one. So it's best to start trying to figure out what you want to work on yourself and doing that.

[can-]

don't lose track of your general self maintenance routine-- that's exercise, seeing friends, playing music, generally all the constructive stuff you do for yourself

[Bobbin.Threadbare]

Breaking up is really hard. It's like kicking a habit - but it doesn't feel awful forever.

You'll be so fine. Welcome to come pub crawling in London to get over it.

[pirxthepilot]

eh nevermind

[sweeeeeeeeeeet emootion]

i'm not looking forward to going back to uni because my flatmates are all really outgoing but i prefer to go to the library or stay in, maybe have a joint, watch films, listen to music, do some work, cook etc. this means that my flatmates will be hassling me to go out to a club all night. i'd even go a quiet bar or something, i just hate clubs; overpriced entry/drinks, i cannot dance to save my life, full of horrible people and music. is anyone else with me on this? i just feel so alone at uni when i'm not in class ;______;

i also feel like i'm not being 'fun' even though i'm a pretty nice person and funny i suppose

[fun_yunchables]

[IsaiahSchafer]

I posted this in a rep comment to molasses, but honestly this advice has made some super positive change in my life, I read it in a book geared towards overcoming phobias and anxieties.

"Worrying doesn't solve problems, action does"

While it's healthy to let yourself feel emotions and be angry, learn how to deal with the anger, etc. It's not good to let your worrying/thinking/over-thinking consume you. I don't just mean in the sense of the depression it brings stopping you from exercising, getting out of bed, etc. Even if you carry on a normal routine, the worrying thoughts are going to take their toll. Take action. so (this is just generalized stereotypical problem advice) "why doesn't she like me, should I have said something different, did I talk too much about care-tags, did she like my rep comments I showed her?" turns into "She mentioned something about Camus, maybe I'll check out that book at the library. This is a good a time as any to get into origami since I have a train ride over there anyway, she'll love this complex flower I make her!"

Even if she doesn't like the flower... what have you lost? Now you read a book and gained a cool skill. Sorry for the ramble, I went to therapy for a few months and turned into a genius.

[BobbyZamora]

tired of people telling me what a piece of shit i am

tired of agreeing with them

[harmsalmon]

I really dislike how I look, what can I do?

[UnwashedMolasses]

Clothing or physical appearance?

[mc-lunar]

been getting super frustrated recently because of an inability to focus and not command-T or alt-tab out to care-tags and tumblr et al and i was wondering how other people took care of this sort of thing. how do you focus on the computer? do you have tips and tricks or whatever or do i just need to stop that habit?